I am nearing the end of my journey as an undergraduate student, I am exhausted and I’ve had enough. I was supposed to be finished by now, but I screwed up and could not make the thesis deadline. My last summer as an undergrad is completely ruined.

All is not lost, I have managed to work my way out of failing the year, thanks to my above average grades from the first semester. The problem now is that I have not managed to progress from where I got stuck.

Currently it is because, I can’t stop watching that ridiculous show called “How I met your mother” (4th Season and we still don’t know who their mother is) and playing an old game that I’ve only recently installed.

I’ve managed to put off for playing GTA IV for more than 3 years and now at the last stretch of my degree I blew it and couldn’t resist anymore. I am a big GTA fan, from the moment I picked up GTA 1, I was in love with it. Each and every GTA game was enjoyable to me and I’m currently loving the fourth one, maybe even a bit too much for my own good.

But what I can’t understand is why I am throwing away something so important. I should be working day and night, but I just don’t have the will to do more than 2 hours a day of work.

You see when I first entered University I was excited and had high expectations for the institution and myself. Sadly reality hit after two weeks and I proceeded to have the worst 5 years of my life. Its sad really and now that its coming to an end, I should be relieved, but instead I want to relive it again and change every action I made.

People & friends in my course are getting ready to celebrate and go out to get great jobs this summer, but I will be stuck in my room doing something I should have done ages ago.  The worst thing about it all is that I cannot tell my friends anything, because if I do I’d put myself in an awkward position.

I am writing this post as a last bid attempt to get myself to wake up and realize what is important in my life right now. Hopefully this will work.

Eight hours work - Eight hours play - Eight hours sleep

Goodnight.